how i fell in love with – and abandoned – a minivan (part one)

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(So I took a month off.)

I left DC a few weeks ago — prematurely it turns out: I was just beginning to fall for the place — for the wilder, poutine-er pastures of Canada. Now, there are several options w/r/t to transportation, but considering the not-insubstantial amount of stuff I’ve accumulated (about 90% of which is books/clothing), only driving really made sense. And wouldn’t you know — a family member’s minivan was mine for the taking.

I’m not supposed to like the Minivan. It’s big, clunky, devoid of any cool quotient — the exclusive vehicle of a mom (or the mom-like), inexcusable for anyone who is none of the following: parent, kidnapper, flower guy, handyman. I repeatedly sideswiped parked cars — the Toyota Sienna, I tell you, is wide beyond comprehension or driver-seat perception — and collected a bouquet of parking tickets. (Not really related to vehicle size or uncool factor, I know, but I can’t help but suspect that a parked minivan in downtown DC makes a sensible first stop for Mr. Meter Maid — the owner is almost certainly not violent (with possible exception of kidnapper (see above), but his van is, almost by definition, all-white, rundown and tinted/windowless), plus it’s big, instantly noticeable, and whatever the ostensible logic behind specific parking violation, the van runs doubly afoul.)

But then I packed the baby up. I’m trying to avoid a full-blown, crying-in-the-rain, knees-in-mud, boombox-over-head rhapsodic declaration for my vehicular love here, but a van outfitted with two sliding doors, a back door that opens like a magnificent yawn, and the back seats removed is just an orgasmic joy to pack. You don’t need to plan meticulously, and/or triage the luggage and stuff so the more necessary = more accessible; EVERYTHING is accessible. It’s like a closet with entries from all sides.

Literally everything I owned went in. There’s something exquisite about this, all possessions more or less ready and within reach — you’re prepared for anything.

Much more tomorrow.

Written by menachemkaiser

23 June at 21:55

Posted in rants

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